Xmas Office Party Hash 2019 @ The Bridge Hotel


Twas the Hash before Christmas, and all through the town

The Hashers got mortal and r*n up and down

Twenty or more of them dressed up in lights

And tinsel and baubles and similar shite

On Out from the old Bridge Hotel they were led

By Pimp, looking sharp with elf’s ears on his head

round Westgate, Bigg Market, High Bridge, then Grey Street

Newgate, Blackfriars, along Stowell Street

To Rosie’s Bar for the first pint of the r*n

(Think Five Kuai caught up just in time for that one)

Then up by St James, round the RVI’s gate

No stop at the Trent or the Cat did they make

But straight through the Uni then right to the road

At Barras Bridge, where there ain’t no bridge no mo’

And on through the park, to John Dobson then round

To Northumberland Street with a Christmas fayre crowd

All thought it was Trillians for the next stop

– Innconts was quite sure, he was caught on the hop –

But the r*n it went on, through to Carliol Square

On down and then up via Fat Buddha stairs

At last to the Quay where some tipis did rear

And here, at last here, drank the Hash some more beer.

There were bars in and out, all were glad of a rest

Twas cold enough out to freeze tits off your chest

The wa*kers had landed a long time before

Enough to have pint number three, maybe four.

The hare started shouting and nudging his dad

“On Gripper! On Frogsporn! On Misled! On Sab!

On Rover! On TC! On Slippery – fuck’s sake

Can we just get on back? It’s gone half past eight.”

They r*n up the Quay, up the Side to the top

Nashed past the Keep then On Inn to the pub.

In there they circled and sang them some songs

(mis’rable punters would not sing along)

There were many returnees – a short list of drop-ins:

Babe Magnet, Grasshopper, Story and Poppins

Everyone missed FRBs here and there

Nobody noticed, and only Pimp cared

They were too full of cheer to be arsed with that shite

Merry Hashmas to all, ’twas a hell of a night!


And now I can say, with a real touch of class

Tetrameter is a right pain in the arse

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